Monday, September 22, 2008

Hmmmm

It's been a very long journey since the summer ended and to be honest... I want my summer back!  Moving back to Florida has taught me a very valuable lesson in planning and thinking things through.  When I decided to come back to Florida, I didn't really have any other place that I really felt called to be.  I loved my church, I loved (and still absolutely adore) my friends, they wanted me here, and so I thought, "Why not?"

My family here wasn't entirely excited about me coming back, assuring me that the economic situation of this city was not one that you move here for.  But I didn't listen, I had made up my mind and I didn't even think about it... my next thought was I need a place to live.  Leah was awesome and found this perfect place for us and that was that.  But when I actually got here and began to try to figure out my life here, I realized that maybe this wasn't the right choice.  The economy is in fact, bad... and everyone says, it's the national economy, but NO, no it's particularly bad here.  Everyone is looking for a job.  I am overqualified for the jobs I am applying for and there is nothing that can pay what I need to live.  So, needless to say, I have been stressed.  There are so many job opportunities back in Texas right now and I may have to go back sooner than I want to, but I guess it's finally hit me that I have to grow up and be an adult.

My week and a half trip back to Texas was extremely helpful.  I got to reconnect with people I hadn't seen all summer and other people that I really wanted to see and I felt refreshed and more prepared to come back to Florida.

I can thank my wonderful friends here for making my time here bearable!  Friday night, we all went to the beach and played volleyball, then football, then everyone ran into the ocean with all our clothes on and played in the waves, which was frankly a little terrifying because it was so dark.  Then we went back to our place and ordered pizza and hung out.  Saturday after church, some of us went to Cici's Pizza then Cara and Tara came over and we watched Heroes (my latest addiction).  The girls spent the night and Leah made us homemade donuts for breakfast and brought us lunch after church.  It was really a wonderful weekend and I'm so thankful for that.

I just feel like I'm in a very weird place right now.  I'm not gonna lie, I sure don't like it.  There is so much going on in my life that I'm certainly not gonna blog about, but the only way to describe the way I feel sometimes, is Damaged, which is a horrible way to feel.  But I hope and pray that God will use this time to bring me closer to Him, that He will teach me and use me here to His glory and that I will have a positive outlook!